Thursday, October 9, 2014

sometimes it is hard to speak up

I almost lost a close friend due to my faith.  I am not close to him anymore but I told him I believed homosexuality is a sin and I don't believe it is a Godly way of life.   I love him and want happiness for him and told him this when i had my daughter and he came out of the closet to me.
This was the first time I ever stood up for my biblical beliefs and it was hard.  I felt broken but I knew it was something I had to do.  I couldn't live a lie and tell him I accepted his choices.  I'm crying typing this because the hole it put in our friendship.  before I spoke up every time he was in town we tried to meet up for lunch or something but once I told him my heart it stopped.  I haven't seen him in person in almost 8 years. He blocked me on facebook for awhile when I posted a few comments about voting for amendment 1 being added on to NC's state constitution.
I want to be real for just a few minutes with anyone that is reading this. I DO NOT HATE GAY PEOPLE PERIOD.  In fact I love one in particular just like a brother and was super close to him growing up and stepping up for God cost me that relationship more or less but I don't regret it at all.  I still pray for him and a part of me hopes things will change.
All the publicity I have been seeing online about amendment one being overturned has all this on my heart heavily and feel like I was meant to share here for some reason.
It isn't just homosexuality I disagree with it is adultery, divorce, lying, gossip, stealing, jealousy, promiscuity, and every other sin or temptation that is placed out there on a daily basis.  I am not the judge of anyone that commits any of these acts but as a child of God I cannot say that sin is ok and I cannot see the world as shades of gray.  Things are either of God or not of God.

No I am not self-righteous I don't think I am better than anyone.  I struggle but the thing is I try and God knows my heart and he knows I try to the best of my ability to live for him and live by his word.  I fall short a lot but I also hit my knees and cry out to him to forgive me.  God came to earth in the form of a man and lived on earth, died on a cross, and rose from the dead, ascended to heaven, and is coming back.  He did all these things so I could be forgiven so I could be washed clean and although i have to repent for small things daily when he convicts me I change what he convicts me of.  But Jesus didn't just do this for me he did it for everyone. Anyone that calls out to him can have eternal life but they have to walk away from sin.

Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,
1 Corinthians 6:9 kjv (scripture is new testament after Jesus paid the price for our sins it isn't leviticus where people were put to death for their sins)

God loves us all whether we accept the gift of salvation and try to walk in the truth of his word or whether we stay in the world and live the way that pleases the flesh.  
At one point before I really studied the bible I had a terrible potty mouth but I honestly can't tell you what the last "bad" word that came from my lips was.  I was convicted by the scriptures and I changed.  God forgave me of my sin and he can forgive anything anyone does. So I just pray for those who see me and label Christians as bigoted and closed minded because if someone is truly living for Christ they hurt when they see SIN embraced and treated as good.  But to enter into heaven we must turn from the sin.  We get refreshed and forgiven by repentance but repentance doesn't mean continuing on with something God let's us know is wrong.

I love everyone and I want everyone to see the love of Christ through me not just feel like I am some high and mighty judgemental hypocrite.  I attend a church where the pastor steps on my toes and doesn't sugar coat the word of God and I am not going to live a life where that is what I do.  It is my job to stand up for what is right and wrong for when my savior comes back he is coming back for those who live for him.

Ephesians 5:25-27 (kjv)
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

It is the my goal to be part of this church the one that tries to eliminate my spots and my blemishes.  I try to be a better person with each passing day and to show the love of Christ even to those who hate me for that love.